Blah.

[flyboy_fox]

Blah. Blah blah blah. Blah :P

Yep.

Blah.

I want something to do... I am so bored, I'm going out of my head. I wish I could get a job, just so I'd be DOING something instead of sitting at home like some kind of lazy hobo. Sure, I have college on Mondays and Tuesdays... but... it's not enough :\ I don't mean to sound arrogant, but the course I'm on is FAR too easy and it's not challenging me at all. But it's something I have to do because I missed out on getting traditional qualifications (because I left school so prematurely), so I need this in order to get into University :\ Man... all I do is sit here at my computer... I'm so bored n.n;

Now, if I actually had friends, I might have a social life. People to talk to, to go places with and do things with. I wanna get out of this house. It's not that I'm an unlikable person... I've had 'real life' friends before. But then I left school at 14 and never ever met anyone since then. Simply because I never went to the places where people tend to meet friends. Hopefully that will change at University. Maybe I'll meet some like-minded people and actually have real-life friends again.

I'm not the kind of person who craves popularity. I tend to be a bit of a loner anyway. But I don't like being always so totally completely and utterly alone. Having nothing to do makes it worse. I never thought I'd say this, but at times I'm SICK of this computer. At college, I'm on a computer non-stop. I come home, and I'm on the computer. The rest of the week, I'm sitting here at this computer. I WANNA HAVE A LIFE.

I wish I knew what to do. There's nowhere around here for me to meet people. There's no places for me to go by myself to spend the day.

It's frustrating.

I want to be happy because I'm gaining a qualification and I'm doing well and I have my health (even though most of my online friends seem to be sick right now ;_;), but... I feel blah. Blah blah blah.

Blah.

Comments

[sullmaster.livejournal.com]

Hey, there's always stuff to do Jai. Join clubs at school, go out and crash a party, try a new sport even. I'm sure there is plenty for you to see out there in UK that relate to some of your interests. Don't be shy, just give something new a chance and go for it!

[flyboy-fox.livejournal.com]

You think I haven't thought of those things, Sull...?

"Join clubs at school" - It's a college in the middle of London. a) It's too far for me to travel more than twice a week. b) It's too expensive for me to travel more than twice a week (it costs £8 per day as it is). c) It's a college, not a school or a University. There aren't really any clubs there since people only do 1-year courses.

"go out and crash a party" - Whose party am I gonna crash? I don't KNOW anyone! Besides, I live in North Cheam. It's hardly a safe place. Even my street-smart brother wouldn't dare crash a party around here :\ I feel scared just walking back from the busstop alone around here...

"try a new sport, even" - And how am I going to do that? There's no sports clubs around here except for under-18s. And even if there were, I can't afford membership and I suck at sports anyway.

I appreciate your suggestions, Sull... but I've been through them all already. You know, I really feel like just giving up...

[sullmaster.livejournal.com]

I honestly think you should consider saving up to stay at school rather than living at home. I didn't mean you didn't think of those things don't get me wrong, but you're missing out more while at home. If you can put money aside for future years and maybe try to get a dorm room you'd find more things to do. My college offers a ton of clubs to join, I'm kinda surprised that your school doesn't offer more.

Jai I don't know many people at my own school. Remember that party I told you about where I met some new people? I didn't know a single person there, but I went there anyway. And I made a few friends because of it. Maybe in London they may have a few parties, I don't know I'm just throwing some ideas out for ya.

Here at my school they offer intramural sports where you don't have to worry about being good. It's just for fun, just to run around and get some exercise. Weird, my school offers stuff like that for free. Why would they charge you extra anyway. I've never of that in my life.

Well don't give up, that's the last thing to do. Try calling the school and see if they can give you some suggestions on what to join. Couldn't hurt to try...

[milesamatthias.livejournal.com]

I hope you're not mad at me from recent things Jai...

Just wondering... You've met other people online that are somewhat near you (I'm pretty sure at least). Have ya given thought to going to see/visit them? Scary as the thought might be, it may help out how you're feeling.

Don't give up though please, whatever you do. You've had to smack some sense into me before, now I'm asking you...

[flyboy-fox.livejournal.com]

The only person who I know at all well who lives in the UK is Leon. And his mom won't let him meet me yet, since he's 15 and I'm 21.

The great thing about the internet is meeting so many cool and like-minded people. The downside is they all live so goddamn far away x.x

[milesamatthias.livejournal.com]

Well we'll have to plan out some distance fights then :)

Just don't lose hope. Still plenty of time to figure out something. Heck, maybe make a move to the US where many of us are! :D

[andysquirrel.livejournal.com]

you'll make some friends at uni, no worries

[flyboy-fox.livejournal.com]

I hope so. Thanks ^^

[helios-inferno.livejournal.com]

Hmm..
Well I can understand you want to do something, I should say try starting up a hobby you can really keep working on.
My brother (as he was without work/education for a while) started up an rpg forum and tried his hands on programming his own games (in fact still busy with a large online rpg game he wants to start up).

You might want to try and find a hobby or something like that.
Pick up drwing, programming, sculpting, painting, writing poetry..anything artistic is normally a good thing to try out.
It may not give you friends to hang out with though, but in your neighboorhood some online friends "might" live you can visit, like stated in above comment by milesamatthias.

Whatever the case, you really should never give up on anything though, i'm sure if this is over and you get to the university you will find some good friends.
Believe me, universitary students are realy nice people through my experience.
And I have visited two different universities in two different cities, and even had a universitary medicine student as a friend for a while.

I'm sure there is something you can do, you really don't have to get so down like that.

[flyboy-fox.livejournal.com]

I already have hobbies with writing, drawing, etc. I really want to leave my house and do other stuff. Maybe I can volunteer somewhere, if I can get paid work yet...

[lunarocean777.livejournal.com]

Well...I'm sure you know how I feel regarding this. As much as one of us believes it at the time, telling the other "Don't give up" doesn't really help much...ya know?

Anything suggestion-wise that I bring up I'm almost positive you've thought of already. I'm really not sure what to say, as I'm certain you've gone through things to try and remedy this.

The only thing, really, is that once you get to uni things will be better. If I recall, you'll be living in a dorm? That alone is a single, enourmous change. It is virtually impossible to not find some people you enjoy being with that enjoy your company as well. It's just part of the nature of most universities combined with dorm life. Comutters also experience this, though it's missing something with the dorm experience. Still, there will be a lot of time during the day that is unfilled by class, where you'll just chill for about 10-20 minutes. And you'll have the choice of doing it alone or with others. I don't really know how to describe it...but something is just different.

Volunteering is nice, and that has a good chance of helping if you find the right thing. Honestly, all I can say is to keep going until you get to uni. Things will change, then. I don't know how they will, but there will be a difference in life with it. I'm nearly positive it'll be for the better.

I know you want to give up. I also know that you won't. Any doubts you have, I'm sure you'll overcome eventually. Life may be hard right now, and as I've said, I can't imagine just how hard it is, but good times are bound to follow. Feel better soon, Jai ::hugs::

[naoe-riki.livejournal.com]

And again, you remind me of myself. But I do have friends.. Well, some of them I almost never meet..

Anyway. Which course are you on? Maybe you'd like to be on some other course?

When you get to the university, it will probably get better.

Maybe you have some online friends who live somewhere not far from you? Wait.. So you do study at London.. I'm sure in London there are many people who are, for instance, sonicfans (tailsfans) like you are.. Why not meet with them? Maybe you'll become real friends.. I have two such friends here :)

[shaboba330.livejournal.com]

I know nothing I say will help x.x;; but I do know exactly how you feel. Lacking a social life is hard, especially when everyone else around you seems to have one. But it's not how many friends you have, it's how good a friend they are. I hope that means something ^^; *huggles tightly*

[twitchytwitch.livejournal.com]

Me too! ;-; Plus I've got my period right now and can't stay still. x.x

[twitchytwitch.livejournal.com]

But hey, I'm sure you'll make friends at school! ^^ ... And stuffs.
I know! You should go take a nap.
Sleep is so good... sleeeeep... I love sleep...