Compromise
Jun. 21st, 2011 08:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
flyboy_foxHow can it be so cold in my house at almost the end of June? :P Sweater, blanket, hot water bottle, cup of steaming tea... still cold ;_; Stupid freezing house. Ah well.
So, I've been back and forthing about the whole Summer of Sonic thing for the past couple of days, and I did what I needed to do as soon as I got the chance - I talked to my mum about it, lots.
My mum acted just as I expected she would. She doesn't want me to cancel SoS on account of her and said she would never forgive herself or me if I did, and that it would only give her extra stress if she thought I was giving up SoS solely because of her hospital appointment. There's no way she'll be talked out of it; believe me, I tried.
She also said that as much as she really appreciates my offer of going to the hospital with her, she thinks she'd actually prefer to go alone. She said that's because taking someone with her for 'support' makes her feel like it's a bigger and scarier thing, and that if she goes alone it will feel more like just a routine check-up. I do understand that, even if I'd still rather be with her, but I respect her wishes.
It's true that she likely won't get any bad news that day, either. She'll either be given the all clear, or asked to come back for more testing, or given the results at a later date. And the tests themselves could be mammogram, ultrasound, or needle biopsy... not pleasant, but mostly just uncomfortable at worst. She won't be strapped to a cold metal table in a torture chamber. It will be quick, and then it will be done. She'll be fine.
Of course, even telling myself all that, of course I'm too worried to just fuck off to SoS and leave her to it. So Jei and I worked out a compromise where we'll stay in Bleadon until after her appointment, and then get an afternoon train to London, arriving in the evening. It means we'll get in late and probably miss the pre-convention party, but it's a small price to pay for being around for my mum. That way, if she decides at the last minute she wants company to the hospital, I'll be here, and on the minute chance she gets less-than-brilliant news, I can still cancel going at the last moment.
So, yeah, long story short: I'm probably still attending SoS but will get into London late. Still subject to last minute change, of course.
Anyway, I'm glad that's sorted.
Jei's back in Bournemouth for one night, just finishing up some last errands, so I'm here by myself which is why I'm back on LJ XD; She graduates on July 1st n.n I'm so happy and proud of her. Can't wait! Then on July 6th she's going back to America and will be gone for a month before I join her in August for happy fun cruise times and a road trip down to Florida to meet my sister for the first time! Exciting stuff...
Remember how Miles told Scrog that if he wanted to make up for missing Miles' birthday, he'd better show up with absinthe and some fine cigars? :P Well, Scrog didn't bring any cigars (thankfully!), but he did show up with a little over two-thirds of a bottle of absinthe, which he'd bought off Jei's flatmates in Bournemouth... so he and Miles spent the other night drinking absinthe and watching Repo! The Genetic Opera. They both seemed to enjoy it (being tipsy probably helps) XD So, that was fun. They want to watch either Saw or The Grudge next, but Jei and I also picked up Inglorious Basterds and Sin City while we were in town yesterday... so there's plenty to choose from ^^
Also in town, Jei saw a t-shirt that she thought Miles would like, so we got it. It has an interesting pattern on it, and a kinda cool built-in scarf-like thing. It's nice. But it's also grey. Miles needs more colour in his wardrobe :P The only colour he likes other than black and grey is red, so next time he's gotta have a red shirt... I'm getting kinda tired of being stuck in black and grey when he's around. I also miss wearing my colourful Sonic shirts all the time, but eh. It's cool. As long as I can wear them sometimes.
Scrog's working on a Scourge sculpture that's gonna hopefully be on our table at SoS (XD) and it actually looks really good so far. There's not much time left to get it done, but I'm sure he can do it.
I finally managed to pick up some books of Arrowwords books that are actually pretty challenging. I'm addicted to cryptic crosswords and arrowwords puzzles, so this makes me happy (:
All right, well, I guess that pretty much sums up everything for now. Catch ya later, LJ!
So, I've been back and forthing about the whole Summer of Sonic thing for the past couple of days, and I did what I needed to do as soon as I got the chance - I talked to my mum about it, lots.
My mum acted just as I expected she would. She doesn't want me to cancel SoS on account of her and said she would never forgive herself or me if I did, and that it would only give her extra stress if she thought I was giving up SoS solely because of her hospital appointment. There's no way she'll be talked out of it; believe me, I tried.
She also said that as much as she really appreciates my offer of going to the hospital with her, she thinks she'd actually prefer to go alone. She said that's because taking someone with her for 'support' makes her feel like it's a bigger and scarier thing, and that if she goes alone it will feel more like just a routine check-up. I do understand that, even if I'd still rather be with her, but I respect her wishes.
It's true that she likely won't get any bad news that day, either. She'll either be given the all clear, or asked to come back for more testing, or given the results at a later date. And the tests themselves could be mammogram, ultrasound, or needle biopsy... not pleasant, but mostly just uncomfortable at worst. She won't be strapped to a cold metal table in a torture chamber. It will be quick, and then it will be done. She'll be fine.
Of course, even telling myself all that, of course I'm too worried to just fuck off to SoS and leave her to it. So Jei and I worked out a compromise where we'll stay in Bleadon until after her appointment, and then get an afternoon train to London, arriving in the evening. It means we'll get in late and probably miss the pre-convention party, but it's a small price to pay for being around for my mum. That way, if she decides at the last minute she wants company to the hospital, I'll be here, and on the minute chance she gets less-than-brilliant news, I can still cancel going at the last moment.
So, yeah, long story short: I'm probably still attending SoS but will get into London late. Still subject to last minute change, of course.
Anyway, I'm glad that's sorted.
Jei's back in Bournemouth for one night, just finishing up some last errands, so I'm here by myself which is why I'm back on LJ XD; She graduates on July 1st n.n I'm so happy and proud of her. Can't wait! Then on July 6th she's going back to America and will be gone for a month before I join her in August for happy fun cruise times and a road trip down to Florida to meet my sister for the first time! Exciting stuff...
Remember how Miles told Scrog that if he wanted to make up for missing Miles' birthday, he'd better show up with absinthe and some fine cigars? :P Well, Scrog didn't bring any cigars (thankfully!), but he did show up with a little over two-thirds of a bottle of absinthe, which he'd bought off Jei's flatmates in Bournemouth... so he and Miles spent the other night drinking absinthe and watching Repo! The Genetic Opera. They both seemed to enjoy it (being tipsy probably helps) XD So, that was fun. They want to watch either Saw or The Grudge next, but Jei and I also picked up Inglorious Basterds and Sin City while we were in town yesterday... so there's plenty to choose from ^^
Also in town, Jei saw a t-shirt that she thought Miles would like, so we got it. It has an interesting pattern on it, and a kinda cool built-in scarf-like thing. It's nice. But it's also grey. Miles needs more colour in his wardrobe :P The only colour he likes other than black and grey is red, so next time he's gotta have a red shirt... I'm getting kinda tired of being stuck in black and grey when he's around. I also miss wearing my colourful Sonic shirts all the time, but eh. It's cool. As long as I can wear them sometimes.
Scrog's working on a Scourge sculpture that's gonna hopefully be on our table at SoS (XD) and it actually looks really good so far. There's not much time left to get it done, but I'm sure he can do it.
I finally managed to pick up some books of Arrowwords books that are actually pretty challenging. I'm addicted to cryptic crosswords and arrowwords puzzles, so this makes me happy (:
All right, well, I guess that pretty much sums up everything for now. Catch ya later, LJ!
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no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 08:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 08:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 12:44 pm (UTC)See you there, I guess, unless something else comes up.
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 12:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 02:08 pm (UTC)Also, forgive me my ignorance, but who is Scrog? The last few times I read the name, I thought you misspelled Scourge. ^^;
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 02:18 pm (UTC)Scrog IS Scourge. I did explain it a little while back, but it's been a little joke between me, Jei, Miles and Scourge that nobody online seems to be able to spell Scourge XD We've seen everything; Scug, Scurd, Sourge, Socurge... but our absolute favourite misspelling was Scrog and it just kinda stuck ^^; So now Scourge is known as Scrog.
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 04:25 pm (UTC)Aaaah, I see! ^_^; So I was halfway right~
I must've missed the explanation! ^o^;
Sounds like Jessie/Jesse/Jessy (THAT'S AN OFFICIAL SPELLING, my God)/Jessi/KFDKJDSKJDSFJKSFKJFK;;
Okay, the last one wasn't a real spelling.
I've always gone with Jessie, since her name's Jessica!
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 05:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 06:23 pm (UTC)Aha, see? xDD;; And Jessy just sounds so silly!
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 05:21 pm (UTC)I kind of know a little what you're feeling right now, because I literally just went through the same thing with my mom. Her appointment to find out if what was in her breast was cancer was yesterday. Fortunately, my mom turned out to be okay. But the waiting was awful. Every time someone casually said "how are you?" I wanted to say I was being torn apart with worry over this huge thing, but I didn't tell people what was going on with my mom because I didn't want anyone to know unless her test went badly. But it's like being on the edge of tears every second but you shouldn't really cry because the odds are in your favor and and there's nothing you can do anyway so what's the point of worrying, just wait- but it's impossible not to feel anything as you helplessly wait- it's your mother.
I wish I could give you some advice, but I don't know how I just went through this myself and I don't know that anything I say could really help you anyway. I think you already know what you have to do- keep loving your mom and being there for her, but also keep living your own life with passion- because that will make her happy too. Believe in your own strength, and rely on your Jei and your friends when you feel weak sometimes. You can get through this no matter what happens.
I will be praying for you mom and you, and hoping that you get your good news very soon.
no subject
Date: 2011-06-21 05:25 pm (UTC)I'm so glad that your mum's results came out negative. I know the odds are in favour of my mum's results being just as clear, but yes, of course I'm worried, all the time, on my mind, every moment.
However, support from people like you and my other friends really helps me to stay happy, optimistic and strong for my mum while she needs that. At least she will have an answer one way of another very soon.