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flyboy_foxI had a highly bizarre dream last night (one of the ones where Jei and I are Sonic and Tails). Lemme copy & paste what I told Jei:
"[W]e'd been captured or something, but it was Knuckles and some others who captured us, because for some reason they believed us to be evil (or maybe they were evil, I dunno). Anyway, we were in separate areas, but we each managed to escape and we were trying to find each other... but the guards (and Knuckles) got alerted and there were a whole lot of people after us, and even though you as Sonic could run fast, they still captured us both again... I think maybe they were Echidna* tribespeoples or something and they used a spell to stop us from running, I dunno. But anyway, they were marching us back to the cells, and you as Sonic were just being really cocky and cheeky to Knuckles and making him even more pissed off n.n; it was kinda funny... but we were walking back through this forested area and I guess I tried to make a break for it or something because we weren't being physically restrained at that point... but then Knuckles grabbed me roughly before I could get away and he slammed me into a tree pretty violently and yelled at me to not try anything like that again and to just keep walking o.o; he was kinda psychopathic n.n;; anyway, yeah, that was pretty much the gist of it..."
Yeah, pretty much whack. Jei's response? "gaaah n.n;; crazy Knuckles dream!" ... yeah XD Pretty much. Poor Knux... he often gets written as crazy/psychotic in fanfiction and fanart I've seen, and now he's flipped his lid in my dreams too :P But yeah, he was scary O.o;
Anyway, that wasn't the main thing I wanted to write about. I actually wanted to post about something I've been thinking about a lot again...
I haven't really posted about 'gender' stuff in a little while, but it's still something I think about a lot. I dislike gender a whole lot. I don't see why I have to have one. For the longest time I've felt... well... trapped by gender. Not so much in the sense that I'd like to change my gender completely, but to the point where I just wish I could get rid of any semblance from either side and just be completely and utterly gender neutral.
If I could, I would identify by a gender-neutral pronoun. There are some out there, I guess, but they sound so fake and theatrical and flamboyant. I wish there was just a plain gender-neutral term I could use that wasn't 'it' (as that implies an object rather than a person - I don't even like calling animals 'it' and get a little cross if someone knows my cat's gender and still calls him 'it'), but there really isn't, so I find myself stuck between 'he' and 'she' in my head.
It's not so much that I don't like my given gender... I just dislike gender, period. I'm lucky that I'm actually fairly androgynous in appearance, young-looking too, but I often wish I could appear truly androgynous to the point where it would be impossible to assign a gender to me. As far as sex itself is concerned, I would be content to give it up. Although I suppose I'm not entirely asexual, I'm far less driven by it than many people I know. I had one furre tell me I'm defective as a fox if I don't want sex all the time ^^; But what can I say? It's never been a high priority. Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy it, but... I can live without it. There are other things in life, and in a relationship, that are far more important to me.
I'm not sure why I dislike gender so much... perhaps just because I feel it really doesn't define me. Maybe part of it is also to do with wanting to keep the androgyny of youth. Overall I think it's just a 'me' quirk. I don't feel I really fit either role, and I don't feel comfortable settling on one, because neither 'human male' or 'human female' feels completely 'right' to me. And so sometimes when I have to check a box, I literally pick at random.
Ironic for someone with 'boy' right there in his/her/its username, huh? ^^;;
*Why is 'echidna' not in LJ's spell-checker dictionary? Prejudice! >O
"[W]e'd been captured or something, but it was Knuckles and some others who captured us, because for some reason they believed us to be evil (or maybe they were evil, I dunno). Anyway, we were in separate areas, but we each managed to escape and we were trying to find each other... but the guards (and Knuckles) got alerted and there were a whole lot of people after us, and even though you as Sonic could run fast, they still captured us both again... I think maybe they were Echidna* tribespeoples or something and they used a spell to stop us from running, I dunno. But anyway, they were marching us back to the cells, and you as Sonic were just being really cocky and cheeky to Knuckles and making him even more pissed off n.n; it was kinda funny... but we were walking back through this forested area and I guess I tried to make a break for it or something because we weren't being physically restrained at that point... but then Knuckles grabbed me roughly before I could get away and he slammed me into a tree pretty violently and yelled at me to not try anything like that again and to just keep walking o.o; he was kinda psychopathic n.n;; anyway, yeah, that was pretty much the gist of it..."
Yeah, pretty much whack. Jei's response? "gaaah n.n;; crazy Knuckles dream!" ... yeah XD Pretty much. Poor Knux... he often gets written as crazy/psychotic in fanfiction and fanart I've seen, and now he's flipped his lid in my dreams too :P But yeah, he was scary O.o;
Anyway, that wasn't the main thing I wanted to write about. I actually wanted to post about something I've been thinking about a lot again...
I haven't really posted about 'gender' stuff in a little while, but it's still something I think about a lot. I dislike gender a whole lot. I don't see why I have to have one. For the longest time I've felt... well... trapped by gender. Not so much in the sense that I'd like to change my gender completely, but to the point where I just wish I could get rid of any semblance from either side and just be completely and utterly gender neutral.
If I could, I would identify by a gender-neutral pronoun. There are some out there, I guess, but they sound so fake and theatrical and flamboyant. I wish there was just a plain gender-neutral term I could use that wasn't 'it' (as that implies an object rather than a person - I don't even like calling animals 'it' and get a little cross if someone knows my cat's gender and still calls him 'it'), but there really isn't, so I find myself stuck between 'he' and 'she' in my head.
It's not so much that I don't like my given gender... I just dislike gender, period. I'm lucky that I'm actually fairly androgynous in appearance, young-looking too, but I often wish I could appear truly androgynous to the point where it would be impossible to assign a gender to me. As far as sex itself is concerned, I would be content to give it up. Although I suppose I'm not entirely asexual, I'm far less driven by it than many people I know. I had one furre tell me I'm defective as a fox if I don't want sex all the time ^^; But what can I say? It's never been a high priority. Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy it, but... I can live without it. There are other things in life, and in a relationship, that are far more important to me.
I'm not sure why I dislike gender so much... perhaps just because I feel it really doesn't define me. Maybe part of it is also to do with wanting to keep the androgyny of youth. Overall I think it's just a 'me' quirk. I don't feel I really fit either role, and I don't feel comfortable settling on one, because neither 'human male' or 'human female' feels completely 'right' to me. And so sometimes when I have to check a box, I literally pick at random.
Ironic for someone with 'boy' right there in his/her/its username, huh? ^^;;
*Why is 'echidna' not in LJ's spell-checker dictionary? Prejudice! >O
